3 Simple Things That Either Destroy or Enhance Your Life

Advice or No Advice.

There are 3 things that can destroy your life, your business, your relationships (the good or even great ones) very fast. And they all revolve around advice.

1. Destroy your advancement in life easily by getting advice from the wrong people or on the wrong topic from the wrong person. Not all advice is great advice, and people love to share with you what they are doing or what they think you should do. Take it with a grain of salt, BUT also be actively listening. There could be a gem in what they are saying, but how will you know if you don’t listen? This doesn’t mean you need to absorb and adopt what they are saying, especially if it’s bad advice. What qualifies as “right” advice” or advice at the right time from the right person? Simply look at that person’s credentials in the area you are seeking advice on. There could be exceptions, but for the most part why take business advice from someone who is currently running their business into the ground? Why take relationship advice from someone who complains about their spouse or significant other? You get the point. However, there is also some nuance to this, and that is that you can get great philosophical or general advice on a topic from someone who is maybe struggling through or hasn’t hit a certain level of success in a specific area, because that person may have been in an advanced position or understand some different elements that you may not. The key here is to learn to critically think and assess the advice we are given, and even sometimes just give it a try to see how it goes and if it’s an improvement from what you were doing. Trying new things can be scary but they can be the gift and key to new levels of life being unlocked for you. But be very specific about who and where you get advice from, especially with social media and music.

2. The second deadly sin of advice is not taking anybody’s advice and thinking you have it all figured out. You can for sure get to good or even great places in life like this, however, it is most likely going to be a very slow and painful process. You can go fast alone, but you can go a lot further together. Together meaning along with the wisdom and guidance of others. When you assess the most skilled and best people in all areas of life whether it is physical, mental, or emotional mastery of some topic or becoming a professional athlete, speaker, mom or dad etc., advice can be the gift that keeps giving as you get wisdom and information or knowledge bestowed upon you that has a proven track record of success and can in many ways or cases even fit into a hole or missing piece of the puzzle that you may not have noticed. We can call that filling in a blind spot. Sometimes it hurts to have a blind spot pointed out, but getting advice from the right people and especially at the right time can be a fascinating and fun thing. Seek out people that are going to help you go in the direction you desire and keep thinking about critical thinking and assessing the advice you do get and how to apply it in ways that elevate your game and desires being unlocked in the most positive and helpful way. You can also read, that helps! hah :) Oh, and one more note here. Seek out people sometimes with different or opposing beliefs or views to you. You may learn something incredible through the disagreement or friction of diversity and differences.

3. The third thing that is a deadly sin of success in life is getting lost in our heads. I actually forgot what the third thing was that I had originally planned to write about as I was thinking about this topic before bed, but sitting here staring at the screen for what felt like an eternity but was truthfully about 30 seconds at the most, this idea just came to mind and I think it fits in perfectly. The third thing that can cripple our momentum and movement forward in life is getting lost in thinking (and advice). We live in a constant nonstop information world. You may be subject to one of the biggest pitfalls happening to people all over the country and planet and that is grabbing and turning on your phone first thing in the morning and hitting the algorithm or some sort of mental escape disguised as relevant information for your life and day but that stinks! It also causes brain fatigue, decision fatigue, and myriad other problems both social and relational, cognitive, and extremely emotional as well, and while I didn’t plan to bash on the gift that can be social media or phones or technology, we as people are not hard wired to receive this level of entertainment disguised as helpful things (or advice), so one of the biggest keys to success in any venture - relationships, parenting, social and societal or business success - is the ability to tune it out and focus and take action on the most important aspects of your life! You can get lost in advice world and now you basically have a scrambled brain with so many things coming at it you are unsure what to do or what is right and never take action because your mind is swirling into so many different directions it all “feels” like a heavy lift, when in reality the easiest and best thing to do is just to start checking things off your list each day. Connecting to this many other people also causes a new level of comparison to kick in which is one of the most dangerous things people can do - compare their personal experience to others and use it as an excuse or justification for their own behavior. That will cripple everything around you when do it, although comparing up such as “if they can do it so can I” might and can be a helpful thing when positively aimed at the right target and direction. Sure, I am a huge fan of social media for some reasons and our phones and how we can all be connected in some way shape or form, but the average person struggles a great deal to battle the dopamine kicks and relief it gives when it comes time to get down to reality and dig into the things that truly make us great people and that is actually going out into the world or into our backyard (physically and metaphorically) and BEING a person! So learn to protect yourself from yourself. Get a real alarm clock instead of your phone or learn to do 2 or 3 hard things each day to start your day before grabbing it and diving in. Some sort of focused concentrated effort will consistently move yourself and your life in the right direction, so DON’T get stuck on too much advice or information and instead get rolling with your actionable steps.

   The good news is if you’re taking action each day you really can’t mess things up too bad because even if you make a wrong move most of the time it is fixable so long as it is a cautious and well thought out, considerate process you are doing. But seriously just do the laundry or mop the floor and pay pay the bills or figure out how to pay the bills then tackle the other stuff hah! Make a small list, on your phone, on paper, and stare at it over and over and choose one thing on it to do each day and life is incredible! So get moving and don’t make excuses! Momentum and urgency are very important, as life is both long and short so it’s easy for us to trick ourselves into thinking we have plenty of time but at the same time the time we are thinking we have can pass us by. Enjoy and love on each other in the process! Get after it! :)